A long, strange trip

The job search continues. I have interviews set up, but still I visit job sites. I look and I look and sometimes - about every other day or so - I find some positions that I find interesting. Sometimes, applying to a job is simple - rework my resume, write a cover letter and send an email. Some employers, though, have a different way of doing things. The bigger employers set up a website and have you fill out forms to be submitted to their human resources department. The first step usually goes something like this: "Upload a resume." Simple enough, right? Here's my resume, the rest of this should be easy! Then, they want you to continue to fill out their form. Contact information. It's on my resume, but ok. Skills? Alright, this is getting ridiculous. Job history. Oh, come on, now! I uploaded my resume already, why do you need me to post all of this again? Are you looking to trip me up? Really good strategy, because I won't be looking at my resume as I fil...

I always thought I knew what I was doing when it came to putting together a resume. Maybe not. I created my latest resume with the intent of hitting on the buzzwords those dreaded resume bots are looking for these days. No buzzwords, no one will look at your resume, no matter how qualified you are. I also wanted it to look nice. I took a template I liked from Microsoft Word and built it from there. That was, apparently, wrong. I handed my resume to my uncle this afternoon. He was a vice president for human resources at a pharmaceutical company, so he knows a thing or two about these things. He went right about the process of ripping it to shreds. Fancy template? Bullet points? Get rid of 'em! The coding will just cause havoc with the dreaded resume bots. And why bother making the resume look nice? No actual person is going to look at these things. It's going to go through a computer program, which is going to pull out the key buzzwords: "staff development," ...

Don Draper's myriad intonations of the word, all in one video.

JK Rowling told Oprah that she might return to the wizarding world of Harry Potter for a new book someday. Wasn't it bad enough that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was one of the worst endings to a series since Batman & Robin ? What more can she do? Write a book about Harry Potter's boring life as an adult? Harry Potter and the Wizard's Business Audit ? Maybe this time Ron will get mad at Harry like he did... every other time things got a bit stressful. Maybe, instead of writing a new book, Rowling can take the George Lucas route and just re-release each of the books 20 years later with expanded chapters, new scenes and characters to make the story "complete."

First, President Obama shows his overly-PC, anti-Christmas side by giving a speech the same night as ABC planned to air "A Charlie Brown Christmas." And now, apparently, his State of the Union address will be the same night as the final season premiere of Lost on Feb. 2. Exactly how un-American does President Obama want to be? And more importantly, what exactly does President Obama or his administration have against ABC as a network? You don't see him scheduling addresses against The Simpsons or anything.

These countdowns and count ups keep changing, but hopefully this will be the last time, as I start my new job at the Northwest Herald on Monday. So, the question becomes, how do I fill my days until I start my new job? Today, I'm watching the first season of the original Transformers cartoon. Tomorrow, I may need to go out and buy season 2.1. The original cartoon, from 25 years ago, is starting to fall into "so bad it's good" territory, although it's certainly better than a lot of other fare from back in the day (I'm looking straight at you, Thundercats - I can't even watch a full episode of that anymore). The best example I have right now is in the first episode, when CLiffjumper and Hound are doing recon and find the Decepticons. Instead of listening to Optimus Prime's orders of "Just find 'em," CLiffjumper aims his weapon. When questioned, he says he has Megatron dead center in his viewfinder. So he fires... and misses. I thought you h...

Just a pair of items that have been bothering me. Way back on Day 7, Stacey and I were at the mall, where I bought myself a dashing new winter coat. As we were walking through the mall to JC Penney, I saw something that absolutely appalled me: the mall already had set up its "Holiday Village," complete with photo ops with the guy in the red suit. It's still October! I know we all like to start the holiday season early, but can we PLEASE get through Halloween before the Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa/whatever decorations get broken out? This can only lead to one thing: ABC playing a double feature of "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" and "A Charlie Brown Christmas." On the same night. In September. Also: when it rains, and you're using something the size of a beach umbrella to keep yourself dry, you damned well better know how much space you have on any given size. Otherwise, it's like someone who's used to driving a Beetle parallel pa...